Flying money and a falling Auburnite

I can't take myself anywhere and expect it to be a typical outing. I was so looking forward to Saturday. The main reason is that Lauren and her boyfriend were meeting me in Birmingham for a birthday dinner. Tomorrow she's the big 25. God I'm old.

Anyway, I decided to get out for the day and go to a movie in Birmingham before I met them. I arrived at the theater, paid for my ticket and stepped aside to put my money in my wallet. The wind had been harsh all day but not once did that factor into what I was doing. A huge gust blew underneath the concret entryway taking me by surprise. My money went flying, and my ticket blew into the garbage can. I immediately started chasing my money around, after all I'm unemployed and need every dollar I have. A couple of teenagers started stomping on the dollars to hold them down. They were laughing hysterically at me as I scampered around and collected the money. I thanked them and then went to the garbage can. The kids took off into the theater not stopping to help me get my ticket out. Chickens!

Peering inside I saw my ticket teetering on the edge of a clean piece of cardboard about halfway down. Reaching inside I held my breath as I took the cardboard between my fingers and started inching it up. I had it up at the opening and was about to grab it when another gust of wind blew threw and it fell deeper inside and landed on ... garbage. Yuck!

I heard collective sighs and turned to see several people watching me. About that time the girl at the ticket window yelled, "I can give you another ticket." Where was she five minutes ago?

After washing my hands, I bought popcorn and hid in the darkened theater to see "Alex Cross." I sat on the end of an aisle and other people were still coming inside. All of a sudden I heard a yell and a very large mass fell across me. Scared me to death. I looked down and a very tall man in an orange T-shirt was laying across me and the next seat, moaning in pain. His popcorn was everywhere, in my hair, in my cleavage, in my purse and all over the floor.

Then I saw the word that takes me back to scarey times, "Auburn." I said, "Okay Auburnite get off me. You have me pinned down." He moaned, "I can't. I think I threw my back out." I said, "Only me. This would happen only to me." Finally the manager came and said he'd called the medics but he didn't want to move the man. I said, "You're kidding me!" He assured me he wasn't. So the first few minutes of the movie I sat with buttered popcorn all over me and a large Auburnite across me pinning me in my seat. Finally the medics came and rescued the man. I picked the popcorn off me and I watched the movie.

After the movie, I met Lauren and had an enjoyable dinner at Pablos. She was the bright spot to my day and I forgot all about the other incidents. The movie was very good with a winning performance by Tyler Perry.

I wonder why these things happen to me. I guess I'm just blessed and sometimes wonder if God is up there laughing at me ... I know I would be.